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Self Sabotage

Optimism can lead to Self Sabotage

A kind of blindness where you are unable to see anything negative.  A mistake is obvious to everyone else but you do not see it.  When you are told that you have not answered the question asked and you answer but you know my stand?

You perhaps know the flaws but in your optimism you think that this won’t matter.

The good news is that this can be overcome.  One needs to listen and understand the error of their ways, make the required changes and move on.

Self sabotage can sneak up on anyone, but you can also learn to beat it.

I borrowed this from Author Terri Apter, after I had an annoying experience at a shop here in Nairobi.

Building Kenya by supporting Kenyan products is what I strive to do.  So I intentionally seek our Kenyan made clothes, shoes, handbags, jewellery, and in this case make up.

So I walk into this branch of the shop (usually I would have walked into the one nearer home, but I was in a different part of town so I tried out a different branch – bad mistake)

??Me: What do you have for mascara for sensitive eyes?

◾Agent 0: We have this mascara (she opens a tester)

??Me: Is it for sensitive eyes?

◾Agent: It is good quality.

??Me: (Turning to two other agents chatting away) Excuse me, would you know if this mascara is for sensitive eyes?

❗Agent 1: Don’t worry the quality is very good, it will not irritate your eyes.

??Me: Why are you guys avoiding to answer my question?  Is it for sensitive eyes or not?

❗❗Agent 2.  So sorry madam, yes it is for sensitive eyes, my eyes go red when I use other mascaras, but this one doesn’t do that.

??Me: Thank you for answering the question, tell me why isn’t it indicated on the packaging?

◾Agent 0: Looks at the packaging and then her colleagues and then me.

❗❗Agent 2: Madam can we do a test?

??Me: No way, I don’t want my eyes reacting.

❗❗Agent 2: Please trust me. They won’t but just on the off chance that they do, please use water immediately.

??Me: (My mind is racing at this point, so much to do, so little time.) Okay let’s do this, and I will go about my errands and come back either way.

Agent 0 applies the mascara and I leave.

The mascara doesn’t irritate my eyes and I am back in 30minutes.

??Me: You were right, it is for sensitive eyes, however you must include that on the package for assurance.

❗Agent 1: You see, and you didn’t believe me.

❗❗Agent 2: I am happy it worked out well.

They both leave and I am left purchasing with Agent 0, and the conversation went south at that point.  We agreed to disagree in the end. She felt that she served me well, and I didn’t.  I went ahead to point out the facts, but she was adamant, and even did the unthinkable.  She said that it is okay if I had bought the mascara at another shop.

Optimism lead to Self Sabotage indeed.

Note to self: keep to the regular branch of the shop nearer home.


Lucy is a Co- Author of Wealth Footprints Volume 1, (and is working on her second book), a certified Life Coach, a Mentor and Facilitator. She founded ELEMCEE Consultancy with a vision to help build women by empowering them into transformation.

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